I was in the hospital but then it turned into a crater, down in Palestine.

Now I’ll never see the final season of Better Call Saul, and I’ll never know for sure who blew up the NordStream pipeline.

I thought I would at least finally get to meet the Ghost of Kiev, but when I asked they told me he was a propaganda fiction, and therefore incapable of entering heaven, hell, or even purgatory.

If you were thinking life was hard, just wait until you get to the other side; jesus fuck man.

On the bright side John Brown and his body are both here, and Dianne Feinstein is not.

Really don’t mind if you sit this one out.