(Pete) Davidson said Staten Island hates him but adores (Colin) Jost. The reason for this? “You represent what they could be, the kid who got out–he went to Harvard!” Davidson said. “I represent what they are: a mentally ill community college dropout who got a Game of Thrones tattoo before watching the show.”

I don’t think I’ve ever been mentally ill, at least not to the point of it being a, er, part of my brand.

I am both a community college dropout and employee. I have no tats and I’ve never been to Staten Island and I don’t think I’m missing much, either on the crack and racist side or the I got out to Harvard and golf now side.

I don’t care specifically about Pete the celeb, or Pete the theatrical suicide candidate. I do like a cursory listening, because he started where I started in a kind of existential way. But he’s famous now. Dating pretty ones. Befriended by amiable altruists in his orbit, practicing experimentally at modern nurturing. Would I have been there if I’d been there? No. Because; not mental.

I think.